


The Darkness Between

by RainbowSheltie



Series: Golden/Blue [1]
Category: Adam Lambert (Musician), Better Than I Know Myself - Adam Lambert (Music Video), Tommy Ratliff (Musician)
Genre: Angst, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Derogatory Language, Drama, Hurt/Comfort, Light Dom/sub, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-10
Updated: 2015-05-10
Packaged: 2018-03-29 20:16:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,920
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3909223
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RainbowSheltie/pseuds/RainbowSheltie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Adam's two personas - the light and the dark, blue eyes and their golden counterpart, can't be more different. Yet they are the still only one man. They love each other and the darker persona would do anything to keep his gentle, innocent half safe, protected. </p><p>When Adam's lighter persona is assaulted at a bus stop, his darker persona steps in and he is pissed. The men surrounding him never stood a chance. With such different personas, they are both lucky that they have a lover who understands; it's a fucked up sort of monogamy, but it works for them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Darkness Between

**Author's Note:**

> **BETA** : TheSupernova
> 
> This is the only story which presents Adam Lambert as: TWO personalities inside ONE body.
> 
> Adam does NOT have a split personality disorder because that disorder is characterized by two or more personalities in one body that DO NOT communicate with one another. Dark Adam and Light Adam are able to freely communicate with one another.

  _Save me from my fear, all my agony fades away  
__When you hold me in your embrace_

_All I Need by Within Temptation_

* * *

Adam felt the pressure against his back moments before he was violently pushed into the street, tumbling off the bus bench. He rolled across the sidewalk, with a jarring landing off the curb and into in the vacant bus lane.

"Freak," a voice sneered, a glob of spit hitting the side of his face. "Fag."

"I'm sorry," Adam answered, keeping his head down. "I'll get out of your way."

Crickets chirped within the darkness, moon high and full in the bleakest of nights. A shroud of black, combined with the faint light pollution from this desolated, abandoned and rundown part of the big city, only allowed a blurry outline of light to shine upon them.

"How about..." The voice paused, and Adam looked up to find that the guy wasn't alone. He had four people backing him up. "We do this instead." The gang surrounded him. "Fags like you enjoy taking it up the ass, right? Nothing but women, you lot. How about we  _treat_  you like one? Women are only good for taking it in the cunt, but I suppose your hole will have to do. Just pretend it's a pussy."

Adam couldn't move; he was afraid, his body frozen akin to a frightened animal. He  _hated_  taking it up the ass. He didn’t know why, can't remember, but he has a vague sense creeping in the back of his mind that it wasn't always so. Whatever the reason, he would never bottom to anyone. He tried, had a few boyfriends over the years that he trusted implicitly, who he had  _known_  wouldn't hurt him. A boyfriend Adam trusted with his life. Adam had even gone through therapy to figure out this fear, this aversion and even tried slowly working his way into bottoming, step by step.

First a hand would simply be placed near his ass, then a tongue licking  _around_  it but never touching - slow things, innocent touches but nothing had worked. Fuck, he couldn't even stand to have a hand  _near_  his ass and that was  _with_  his pants on. He would panic, cry out in fear and terror and then... then he would fight back. His anger would rise out of control and a sudden need to Dominate his surroundings would consume him, and Adam found himself  _reveling_  in the onslaught of control and power. The need for control was always present either way, but in his current state of mind it felt...  _dormant_. Asleep.

The men were drawing closer and Adam closed his eyes, cheeks wet with tears because a hand was fondling his nipples through his shirt and cupping his crotch. When he felt large, grimy fingers lightly slip under the back of his shirt, making their way ever downwards, down, down towards  _that place_  Adam just - he  _broke_.

* * *

_"No one touches you, my little one. My soft one," the strong, powerful voice resounded inside his head. A pair of golden eyes flashed behind his eyelids. Adam could see a man in his mind; another version of himself: Dominant, strong posture, confident and self-assured. More than his current state of mind, anyways. This man was his darker persona, the one with the golden eyes. Another Adam. The Dominant, controlling man that excluded a natural control over his environment. "Rest now. I'll take care of you, I always have. Trust me once more."_

_Adam did; he trusted golden eyes with his life. This man always protected him. "I love you," Adam said. "Save me."_

_"Always," came the response and Adam felt his mind slip into unconsciousness._

* * *

_No one_  touches his light, innocent persona. That man, who was a part of himself; the kind and gentle man who was everything Adam was not. This man was _his_  to protect and he would not left those soft, blue eyes down, would not let those eyes cry tears of anguish and despair.

"You picked the wrong man to rape," Adam said, keeping his head down. His eyes, now a bright, brilliant gold flashed briefly in the darkness before settling down. "You don't touch my soft one like that and you  _do not_  make him cry."

He stood up, keeping his eyes focused on the road; Adam relaxed his body completely, ready to let his instincts take over. His lighter persona may not like fighting but  _he_  did. Chinese martial arts were his preference, and he learned a few different Chinese forms to create a mixed style of fighting.

Adam's feet slid into ready stance, his left hand stretching out before him and his right kept low and to the side. "You do  _not_  fuck with me and you certainly  _do not make my soft one cry_."

The men took an involuntary step back on instinct because  _this_  Adam was not the weak, little  _faggot_  they though he was. This Adam was not the gentle, lighter persona who shone like a beacon in the dark, the man who was his savior and kind in a way Adam knew he could never be. He cherished and loved that part of himself, ever since childhood when his soft one had been... the day of the birth of  _golden eyes_. The day this Adam was born.

These men were insignificant  _bugs_  and  _threatened_  his little one. They deserved no mercy. No second chances; that's the kind of man he was.

Adam's body moved fluidly between stances. He had been studying since he was a child, and also knew how to use many different weapons (including the fan, whose dance-like moves were great for incorporating into his choreography for his performances). These men didn't know how to fight properly, although Adam could sense they had a strong background in street style fighting (self taught for the most part). Typically it was sloppy and messy but the dirty-elements added a highly dangerous component to the fight.

It was okay though because Adam had encountered these types before; he didn't know if any of them were armed. Not that it would be a problem per say, but it _was_  easier to block a knife or a weapon if he knew it was coming.

It only took him a few minutes to dispose of the men, although their leader had surprised him by drawing a knife. He got a lucky strike in; Adam's cheek was bleeding from a small cut. Disarm, incapacitate, stand down. Fighting was  _always_  a last resort but these men would give chase and they were located in the worst district in town. No one would be able to hear him scream because the only people who frequented this area were men like  _them_.

The only reason Adam had come here at all was because his interview had been located at a radio station that could only be accessed by driving through this part of town. Normally he would have driven, but his car was currently in the shop, and the bus would only take 30 minutes. Next time, he was taking a cab. Apparently his lighter persona hadn't quite thought this through when he decided to take the bus (when he  _knew_ the late night bus only stopped at this district).

No one would care if a bunch of thugs from this district were beaten to a pulp. Besides, these men probably had a police record so it's not like they would go to the cops crying that they were assaulted by  _Adam Lambert_. Really. Who  _exactly_  would believe them, anyways?

Adam walked back towards the radio station, a 20 minute walk, and called for a taxi; he was home fifteen minutes later.

 

* * *

" _They're gone, little one," Adam whispered, rousing his lighter persona. "We're home. We're safe."_

_Blue eyes looked up at him; he had been crying again. Adam stroked his cheek gently. "Time to get up. Tommy is waiting for us and he's probably worried."_

_"Will he hold me? Am I dirty again?" Blue eyes cried of pain; it hurt to look at. "Will he still love me?"_

_Adam kissed his forehead. "He loves us, he'll always love us. Let him comfort you."_

_His lighter person sat up, reaching for him. Adam caught that slight hand in his, and brought it up to his cheek. He waited for this man to make his move._

_Silence reigned for a time. "Don't ever leave me."_

_"Never, soft one." Adam smiled. "I'll be with you until the end. I'll be by your side when we return to the stardust in the sky. We_ ' _ll hold Tommy in our arms and fly; freedom will greet us and there shall be no more pain."_

_Blue eyes filled with tears, and he kissed his darker persona on the lips. It was gentle, soft and loving. "I love you."_

_"And Tommy loves us both," Adam responded._

* * *

When Adam woke up, he knew his eyes were steel blue once more. Tommy greeted him by the door, and immediately knew something was wrong, and not just because of the cut on his cheek. The blood had dried and hardened in long, streaking drips.

"Welcome home," Tommy said his voice soft. "I will  _always_  love you both. My heart is big enough for all of us. Forever, and beyond."

Whenever Adam had switched personas, Tommy knew that he needed comforting; to be reassured that death would not be the end. While his darker persona responded well to Tommy's submissive behavior - that was  _his_  form of comfort -  _this_  Adam needed commonplace, everyday, loving, normal Tommy who didn't treat Adam like his Dom, but as an equal. A lover to be cherished, loved and supported; to laugh and have fun with, without worrying about rules and submission inside a delicate power exchange relationship.

Tommy was like Adam, in a way - dual personalities; able to switch to what Adam needed. It had taken a long time to get this far, and in the beginning it was hard. Tommy had almost left Adam on multiple occasions because he didn't  _understand_  that Adam was split into two separate personas. Two people who loved each other with a passion, romance, and loyalty in a way no man could rival. Tommy had to learn that to love Adam meant to love  _two_  people instead of one.

It was a fucked up sort of monogamy but it worked for all of them. At least Tommy wasn't jealous anymore that Adam's lighter persona needed his  _darker_ persona to protect and comfort him, take care of him, love him. Tommy was his lover, but he couldn't care for Adam the same way the darker persona could.

Adam couldn't depend solely on Tommy to save him from his own mental issues, unable to do anything more than comfort a lover in distress. His words were nothing more than placating murmurs. Even so, Tommy loved Adam in a way neither persona could do for each other: physical human contact. To love and be loved by another man.

These were hard lessons to learn and it had taken them months, a plentitude of arguments and near break-ups until something  _clicked_ inside Tommy's head: Adam was literally  _two_  people. The changing eye colors didn't just signify a change in personality - they were entirely different people - the light and dark personas.

* * *

_"I'm always with you," Adam's darker persona said. "Feel my arms around you and take comfort in the man we love. Who loves us unconditionally."_

_"Forever," Adam repeated. "All of us."_

**Author's Note:**

> I used to think the Dark/Light Adam Lambert pairing was creepy. Now I just think it's hot.


End file.
